Pregnancy can be a frightening thing for many women who’d like to have kids one day. While all pregnancies come with their own set of inconveniences, unless you’re right in the thick of things, it can be hard to understand the struggles of a pregnant woman.
Alexis Brazell is a young, expecting mom who grew tired of stigmas and reactions to her pregnancy from friends and strangers alike. She decided to take to Facebook to give us all an inside glimpse into her life and hopefully a measure of empathy for expecting mothers everywhere.
As I sit here, 23 weeks, eating apple pie and vanilla bean ice cream, trying to get together a baby shower list, I’m crying (because that’s being pregnant, ok.)
I want to talk about pregnancy for just a minute; about the things people have told you and the things people have NEVER told you (because that would be the right thing to do).
I should probably start a blog just for this post, but I’m too tired for all that work. It’s going to be lengthy, so stick around or not, I also am too tired to care.
Pregnancy is the most fun thing ever. Ever. Baby clothes, ultrasounds, heartbeats, it’s all awesome.
It is also the hardest thing ever. EVER. No one tells you how tired you are going to be. For weeks or months on end. Your spouse/partner will never understand how tired you are because it’s a different kind of tired that you or a nap can’t explain… You want to clean the house, or wash clothes, or even walk to the dang mailbox, but you’re flat out tired. No one tells you. Or really tells you.
Pregnancy has made me feel the cutest/prettiest that I ever have in my life. But no one tells you, that at the same time, it will make you feel the most self conscious and vulnerable. Everyone knows that your belly grows, but they leave out the part that along with your belly, your thighs, boobs, hips, lips, and anything else that can expand, well, it all expands.
This goes back to pregnancy being the hardest thing ever. For an already self/body conscious woman like myself, it’s a tug of war on my mind.
Pants no longer fit, you’re buying new bras and underwear because everything that touches you feels too tight, your favorite dress-well you now have to hope that one day IT WILL fit again. For those people or coworkers that have no self control and say sometimes, “that top is getting tighter” or “yeah, i could tell your hips have gotten wider”.. like, seriously? What part of you thinks that’s ok to say to ANY woman?
It’s hard guys, and people are going to just be people about it.
Pregnancy is so much fun to share with your friends and family. Baby showers, excited grandmothers, sisters and brothers, it’s the best. Pregnancy is also the loneliest. Yes, you have a supportive husband/partner, but they don’t get to know what you’re going through, or feel the crazy kicks and flips, it’s all you. There is always something to want to be able to tell or explain, but no one else will get it because it is happening inside you.
You really find out who your friends are when you’re pregnant too ladies, just wait. Shout out to all my friends that have stuck by me and still think I’m fun. And SHAME on those “they’re pregnant now so i’m not going to invite them, they won’t be fun” type of “friends”. I have found that there are (were) a lot of those people, shame on you all.
We are still fun, just bigger.
And pregnancy is exciting. And scary. And stressful. And rewarding. Pregnancy is everything. Find people that understand you, or better yet, don’t forget who you were when you weren’t pregnant. And come ask me about it all, I’ll be that person that tells you everything.
Thanks for sticking around ’til the end, if you did.
Alexis may be young, but she has vital insight and wisdom into the lives of women just like her on either side of the 9-month spectrum. Give a little grace to your friends who are going through life changes. They’ll be around when it’s all said and done!
Share and spread her awesome perspective.